u have no idea what's going on in my head

So yes... I had some time to think... N I have decided To put everything aside... Im just going to live in the moment... Which means I got to stop kidding myself with all this dreams... So coming back to reality... I am very disappointed to say that my heart is not as strong as it used to...

Its a surprise to me too... I thought I was strong enough... I'm in love...but yes everyone knows that... But now I'm looking at things more physical... N I realize that love has nothing to do with it... Its just different now... I wish I could open up more but that would just be mean... Its not that I love the person but its the intimacy that I miss... That few hours together... Things are so casual... Like I don't have to put out to the world....

I just have to stay me... N that we don't enjoy talking about our problems... Its just about the moment... Although it has to come to an end soon... I'm gonna try enjoy it while I can...